it feels so good to be at home. remembering back the way ayah and ibu smiled at me and kissed me on the cheeks when I reached home made me realize how far we've been apart. ya Allah, if by sacrificing myself would ensure me a better future, I'll do this with an open heart. as I could recall, there are few times ayah sent text messages just to tell that he missed me. see. ayah is the sweetest man on earth. I wish I could have a husband like ayah. inshaaAllah. however I feel quite bad because I did not manage to spend quality time with my family. I spent hours sleeping till 12.30pm ( as I slept at 4.30am , chatting last night -.- ) and studying right after that. on the next wednesday, we'll be having our first test. I've learned frm my previous mistakes that every test we need to take will affect our final pointers later on. so.. wish me luck :)
what's up with everything? ahaa so far so good. thanks to you, hectic life. at least my mind will get distracted from thinking abt the past. it would be a lie if I say that I've completely moved on. truthfully, I haven't, yet. but I'm doing great. I keep on reminding myself that I can go through this with Allah's help. and alhamdulillah as I am surrounded with a bunch of the greatest people all around me. family and friends who will never stop giving me support, who will be there when I need ears to lend on. alhamdulillah. in fact, I can tell that there's no such thing of loneliness. I know I'm not alone and I can stand on my own. I don't need a man. all I need is God. all I need is Allah.
when ppl ask me either I've found someone new to replace, this question leaves me speechless. seriously? do you think forgetting someone is as easy as forgetting what we have studied last week? they said in a way to move on, I need to seek for a new one. yes, it is. I can't argue more but that is just too much.. I ain't desperate. time can heal, isn't? I'll just go with the flow.. besides, it's like I'm using someone for my own sake and that's not a right thing to do.. truthfully, before this, I had a crush on someone but it was not too obvious. I even bragged abt him to my close friends. me and him are friends now. knowing him has opened my eyes that I should know my limit as a muslimah. it's nice to have a 'used-to-be-crush' to remind you about your 'batas pergaulan' and he even reminded me to stay shy with the guys. and yeah, his reminders totally smacked on my head. ya Allah, this is one of His ways to show me the right path. I feel blessed, ya Allah.
:') *breathe in, breathe out*
alright, so next week I'll be going to Janda Baik for my class trip. hopefully everything will turn out well, inshaaAllah. and same goes to my first test..
alright then, see yaa on the next post, :)