life is short. life is so short that somehow I'm wondering how things happen and how do I manage to survive in life. how this and how that which lead me to many unanswered and unsolved bulk of questions that are leaved on hold.
in a blink of an eye, you will turn to, maybe, 20, 21? and then you used to claim that you couldn't live without her or him or anyone, but suddenly something hit you so bad and you lost everything. you thought you had lost everything but as time passed by, you were up again. rising, and shining.
Allah gives you HOPE. that's the most relevant answer I can think at this moment.
Kun Faya Kun! you can never avoid yourself from what He had planned. because yes, we're a human. we are only SLAVES. we are powerless, we have no right to say no. but we can make du'a, the least we can do. see. at least Allah has given us an option. prayers show the connection between us and The Creator but still, many haven't realised and misunderstood the tests He has given. we're too snobbish to sujood, to lower down our ego, to accept that Allah is the only One that we must worship. sadly, we complaint so much.
I used to cry for no reason during my childhood to early adolescent phase. I got no reason why I should cry back then. but now, I feel sad. I feel so sad that saddens me even more when I realize that I can't cry as I used to. I was an expressive person but things changed. have you ever wonder why you were so fool and stupid, you wish you could be a new person. a brand new one, sinless, with an aim that you would become a better slave? a best slave for Him but you know you can never turn back time.
but Allah has told us so many times,
It is He Who accepts repentence from His servants and pardons evil acts and knows what they do. (Surat Ash-Shura, 25)
no regrets. even hundred times you fell, He only told you to REPENT. repent again and again. whenever you fall, you repent. but it is not an excuse to keep on making sins. don't we feel ashamed? we ask too much from Him but what we do is toooooooo little to be counted? forgive me, ya Rabb. forgive us for forgetting you often. :'(